Have you ever tried to explain to someone who doesn’t have anxiety, what it is?
How it feels?
Or what it does to you?
It’s hard to convey any of the above, because the truth is, when it comes to anxiety – those lucky people that haven’t experienced it or don’t suffer from it, really just don’t understand. It’s so hard to explain but there’s no rational thought process when it comes to anxiety, it’s difficult to describe what it does to you and how it take control of your body and mind, there’s no easy way of explaining that it’s hard to consciously cut through and put a stop to it when you’re in the midst of a panic attack or your mind is just off on an anxiety-ridden-tangent – even when it is over something so seemingly ‘trivial’ or minute in the grand scheme of things, or often, for no reason at all.
Google is the guru when it comes to answers and here is the definition provided:
Any of these words ring a bell? Can you feel an automatic association or that instant pang in your stomach just at the sheer thought of them? Yep, me too! So, you’re not alone.
When I had the realisation that I am about to explain, it hit me like a tonne of bricks…a huge smack in the face but at the same time a small sense of relief. Anxiety is something I have lived with, so far, my whole life. Plain and simple. It’s been there ALL along. So, I can hear you questioning…you understand the smack in the face, but the small sense of relief, where does that fit in? Well, let me explain. If you have (or have had) any form of anxiety you will know what I mean, and for those who haven’t (lucky you!!) imagine having a weird, overwhelming feeling on a day-to-day basis, always there – sometimes dull, sometimes more prominent. Imagine feeling sick with worry or a ‘weird’ feeling that you simply can’t explain but it feels like a feeling of impending doom. Imagine your mind constantly ticking over. Imagine that in reality you know something is so far fetched, but you can’t control your mind running away with thoughts. Imagine something so small – like knowing you have to put the washing on – while you’re trying to relax playing over and over again on your mind and it keeps nagging away at you and robs you of relaxing in the present moment. Imagine all of this and so much more, an everyday constant in your life and not really understanding what, why or how it came about. Then, imagine suddenly realising what it is and how long you have been dealing with it for. So many questions are suddenly answered. Bam…Relief!
Now, I’m not saying it’s a good thing – realising you’ve had it your whole life. For me, personally, I have always been an anxious person, as long as I can remember. From the little things to the big things.
Maybe it’s being the eldest child? Maybe it’s being an empathetic person? Maybe there is no explanation?
The thing that is becoming more and more clear to me is that it’s not spoken about often enough, it’s considered quite taboo – but the thing is, it’s so common!
You heard me right!!
YOU ARE NOT ALONE!
And you need to remember that when you wake up with that feeling, you’re having a really bad day with it, you can’t clear your mind, you feel jittery, you want to hide away from social situations, you’ve had a panic attack and feel like no one will understand, or you’re lying in bed with no motivation to get up, or concocting a million different terrible scenarios in your head of something that is either a) out of your control or b) will probably never even happen. The reality is, so many people suffer from it, you’re not alone and it exists in so many different forms.
Recently, I have become aware of something though – the more we talk about it, the more we engage in conversation and share with others, the less power it has. I can’t explain it in factual terms, but it takes something away from the anxiety. And, the more you will find that you are in fact NOT alone. You would be surprised as well, it’s not just the shy, reserved types that suffer…it is the outgoing people, the fearless leaders, the confident, the successful,
And so, if you suffer from any form of anxiety on an any scale, know that this entire area of the site is going to be dedicated to the A word. Let’s start the conversation, let’s share the burden, let’s help each other, be a network of support and get rid of the stigma associated with it.